I haven’t pulled a muscle during sex, but it feels about as inevitable as a breakup announcement from a Bachelor couple. I can’t touch my toes, let alone throw my leg over my shoulder as if it were a scarf; my “splits” are about as acute as the Eiffel tower; and when I take the rare yoga class, I hoard the tools for modification (blocks, straps, blankets) like squirrel prepping for winter.
TBH, getting down with me is like getting down with the Tin Man, and while you don’t need to be flexible to have good sex, I often worry my rickety and distinct lack of flexibility limit my romps. And that’s precisely why I started looking into sex pillows.
First things first: Sex pillows and sex furniture aren’t new; in fact, there are more than 1,000 search results on Amazon for “sex pillow.” And after thinking about it, the concept makes total sense. “A sex pillow is to sex what a yoga block is to yoga,” says sex educator Alexandra Fine, CEO and co-founder of Dame, the sex-toy company that recently launched Pillo. “It helps you reach and achieve different angles and perspectives and supports your body in those positions.”
“Sex pillows help you reach and achieve different angles and perspectives and supports your body in those positions.” —Alexandra Fine, CEO of Dame
Whatever your gender, sexual orientation, or identification, a sex pillow can be of service. You can use it to lift your hips during missionary to allow for easier and deeper penetration with a partner who has a penis or is wearing a strap-on. (“This is especially helpful if your partner has a smaller penis or you have tight hips” says Fine.) Or the pillow can be flipped and used as a prop to decrease the depth of penetration and in such a way that makes reaching the G, A, and PS spots easier, Fine says. “How you choose to use it, depends on both partners’ anatomy. The angle of every vaginal canal and the curve of every penis are different.”
Other uses include boosting your bum for missionary anal, giving your partner something to bend over if you’re experimenting with pegging, and raising your hips during oral. “Put it beneath your hips for great cunnilingus that’ll be easier on your partner’s neck.”
Fine says the pillow can even be used during masturbation, whether to grind up against or change the angle of the dildo or vibrator. “During solo sex, I like to prop a vibrator on it and then then lay and grind against it,” she says.
In short: sex pillows are a sex and #self-care win—and I couldn’t wait to take one for a spin.
The first time my sex-mate and I used our Pillo, we noticed it looks like a triangular version of a very, very stiff and nondescript airplane cushion, which Fine says is by design. “We didn’t want it to be something that screamed ‘sex’ because if you have to put it away between uses, you’ll be less likely to actually use it,” she says. “And unlike a pillow for your head, a sex pillow needs to be firm and dense enough to hold up your bodyweight and likely also another person’s body weight.”
Not only was our session charley-horse-, cramp-, and hip-crack-free as we moved through different positions, but we also lasted longer.
At first we were a little overwhelmed by all its possible uses. Instead of focusing on the pleasure, we ended up basically playing human Jenga, experimenting with all the configurations Pillo made available and comfortable. But, after that team practice, we were ready for the championship game, and wowza. Not only was our session charley-horse-, cramp-, and hip-crack-free as we switched from missionary to doggy to oral, but we also lasted longer. I don’t mean our Go-to-O time was longer. Rather, thanks to the prop, we didn’t have to expend energy holding ourselves up, holding our legs open, or contorting our bodies. The result? Marathon sex brought to us by Pillo. And, once we were done, all we had to do was unzip the cover and pop it in the hamper. *Insert prayer hands.*
Ultimately, Pillo is able to support the things you want to do and try in (or out) of bed without feeling making you feel awkward or in physical pain. Plus, as Fine says, “When you’re not using it for sex it makes a nice backrest.”
For more sex intel, here’s the case for never asking a lesbian couple whether or not they scissor. And did you know there’s such a thing as a B-gasm (a boob orgasm)?